Tuesday, May 02, 2006

My Monthly Post ...

Yes, I've been quite lazy in the blog-world. I'd apologize, but that would indicate a firm resolution to change my habits. I'd rather either do it, or not apologize insincerely. I thought I'd continue with the 'health care' theme I chose a couple of posts ago.

I visited a chiropractor since my last post - one who was recommended by a colleague for his 'bedside manner', as well as his competence. In our first session, he spent close to an hour assessing and giving me an initial adjustment. The assessment left me with the impression that he is more aware of my overall health needs and gripes than my family doctor of the past 4 years. He really was thorough and a tremendous communicator.

There's just one thing.

Part way through the session he pulled out a laser-dealy thing that looked more or less like a check-out scanner. His assistant would hold it to shine the laser on my neck, presumably to return my body cells to their natural 'frequency' of 638 nanometers (yes, I'm a science teacher, and have never heard of anything like this, nor why a wavelength unit is being used to describe frequency. Okay, there's a loose connection, but the way he said it seemed to be to impress those with no science training). He would hold my arm up, supposedly representing my range of motion; then as the laser was shone on my neck he'd raise my arm further and exclaim the miracle of the check-out laser-dealy. He even pressed down on my arm, with me resisting the pressure; then repeated it with the laser on my neck (I'm not even sure it was turned on, to be honest), and made a big show of pushing down with two hands and one leg off the ground, and how much 'stronger' I was with my 638 nanometer-vibrating cells. I'm not making this up. I'm not allowed to make this up.

So, the long and the short of it was an exceptional medical visit, turned into a Twilight Zone experience with two grown adults in the same room trying to sell me the chiropractic equivalent of snake oil.

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