Tories Begin Release of Hidden Agenda

After months (years?) of intense pressure to release the CPC Hidden Agenda (HA), for all Canadians to view, the Conservative Party of Canada has finally begun to oblige. Newshound Craig Oliver has discovered that hanging is to be a central plank for the party going in to the next election. When asked about the leak, a CPC spokesman looked taken aback that part of the HA had escaped from its secret vault. He attempted to deny it at first, saying instead that, "We actually believe in stoning as a method of capital punishment. But, to each his (or her) own. Okay, you're right, hanging barely beat out stoning at the last HA policy convention. Hey, you guys didn't hear about our abortion plans yet, did you? Oops, wasn't supposed to say anything."